June 29, 2008

I've got the urge...

...to just Thank God for everything. for me being alive... I've just got this urge to thank God in advance for all the promotions He has granted me.... for all the favor He has granted me and the uncommon favor that He continually sends my way. He is awesome. Thank God that He is still providing for me. People are complaining about gas prices and everything else going up... but I give God the glory that He is faithful.

I lift up my eyes to the hills. From whence does my help come from. My help cometh from the Lord. He created heaven and earth... My God, who keeps me, will never slumber nor sleep

Thank you Lord for keeping me. Thank you showing me mercy... Thank you for your unconditional love...

I urge you to take a moment to just Thank God for where you are... sometimes we just need to do that. He already knows all our petitions before we ask.... so just begin to give Him glory and thank Him that He alone is God...

Thank you God for being consistently you... inspite of my inconsistencies
Thank you that You remain faithful to me even when I deliberately turn my back from You
Thank you for being there each and every time...
________________

check out MypenMypaper's post on the role of married women with no children HERE

June 20, 2008

Epiphany...

[sex and the city spoiler.. i guess it could be a spoiler. dont read if you havent seen the movie and dont want to know the details of some scenes and if you havent seen the movie the question really is WHY?]

Definition: a sudden, intuitive perception of OR insight into the reality or essential meaning of something... usually initiated by some simple, homely or common place occurence or experience...


...I guess it's something I've always known... deep deeeepppp in the recesses of my mind. But this past weekend, a thought hit me...

THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP SOMEONE FROM CHEATING WITHIN A RELATIONSHIP

I guess there are people who go around hoping that their partner won't cheat... hoping that after one bad relationship, the next one will be perfect. There is NO perfect relationship. All my years of being in one have taught me that! Each relationship is its own carnival. I think the key to success in any relationship is to just put your all (everything that encompasses you being you) into it without losing yourself. Now, that might be a little tricky to balance. At the end of the day it's just important to be happy with yourself. am I even making sense?

Where are my Sex and the City Fans??? Do you remember the part in the movie when they were all comparing their relationships and asking everyone who was happy and no one but Charlotte stated she was happy... everyday... EVERYDAY!!! imagine that...

A friend recently told me of how her hubby cheated and she didnt feel good at all until she herself had paid back the deed in kind. There goes her balancing act I guess... They appear to be still happy... even added another kid to the mix

My boyfriend also relayed a story about a society wedding that occurred last year. The guy after having a baby was now soliciting an "extramarital friendship" with a coworker. The girl refused his advances but apparently has succumbed to his persistent toasting (apparently this is a nigerian rule or know how... with guys anyhow... if you pester the girl long enough... she will agree.... never knew that... someone just told me that's how it is o)... citing how unhappy he is in his marriage. Tell me what his wife is supposed to do in this case. She has no control over her husband's actions. Cant stop him from cheating. Cant leave the baby and follow her husband 24/7

I guess this is where God comes in. Because there is so much temptation out there... too much. Constantly you have to ask God to grant you the grace to get through the day. Bob, in relaying the previous story to me said "I pray to God I dont fall victim to such". I was quick to say Amen... There's God and there's free will too. So God can be helping you but thickheaded you wants to do your own thing still.

but even then... there's life after cheating is there not? When I was younger, I used to say if my man cheats... im GONE... but as you get older you realize that mistakes can be made... and cheating is just one of them...

citing SATC again... when Miranda's husband cheated. I mean... who wouldve thought that dorky old Steve had it in him right? But he did and he did. I sided with Miranda for leaving him... after all he'd broken her trust. I understand he was a bit stressed that they hadnt had sex in a while but this is where communication comes it. Why does it seem a bit more difficult to communicate sometimes when you're in a marriage/committed relationship. For me, I just dont want to seem like Im nagging. So over the years, Ive found ways to communicate things I want without coming off as nagging... Im not perfect yet though... lol. The truth is alot of times, It's not always what you say but how you say it.

Anyways... continuing with the SATC plot.... Something happened between Miranda and Carrie. Miranda said something to Carrie's fiance about what a mistake it was to get married on the eve of their wedding day and the next thing you know, they dont get married and Miranda feels soooooooooooo guilty about it but never mentions a word to Carrie. When she finally does mention it months later, Carrie feels so betrayed and rightly so.... that her bestfriend would dare say such a thing and after saying it, the wedding is cancelled. That was a betray of trust. Miranda kept apologising to Carrie... that she was really sorry... that could Carrie please forgive her... phone calls... cards... she did everything she could but Carrie wasnt budging. After her many futile attempts, Miranda goes to see Carrie and waits by her door till she gets home. Carrie then asks Miranda "you want me to forgive you right?" and Miranda says yes.. then Carrie brings to her attention about the same thing happening with Miranda and Steve... a betrayal of trust... and after Steve's many attempts she still refuses to forgive him....

aaahhh... a moment of clarity.... an Ephiphany! lol

I guess we tend to give different rules or look at things differently between marital/committed intimate relationships vs friendship... when really.. our relationships are extensions of frendship...

My sister got married recently and of one of the mothers of the day.. talked about being friends with your mate. She gave an example. If some reason you need a ride somewhere, you call your friend to come get you and that friend is maybe 10minutes late, you say Thank you and dont complain (under normal circumstances) because you're the one needing the favor... but if it's your mate... it's usually a different story... we start complaining.... so the lesson here is this: I'll take it from one of the 'Beatitudes for the Married':> Blessed are the husband and wife who are as polite and courteous to one another as they are to their friends (a little off topic but you get my drift)

So if you're out there... and you're worrying about your mate being with someone else... communicate your concerns, pray to God and pray for the best... but never forget that your personal happiness... your personal peace... is important...

Have a great weekend yall..
*a couple of my friends have given me their opinion of my new template... what do you think?*

June 8, 2008

I Love...


...chocolate. morris chestnut. so sexy.

...the sound when you signal (or trafficate to give a better understanding... is that even a word? i dont think so!) in your car... and it's dark out and really quiet... tick tick tick. very soothing

...reversing to park. love it. love it. love it. maybe because people tend to see it as hard to do...

...sleeping in the cold. it's summer time and I get to turn on the air

...daydreaming. fantasizing about so many different things

...very spicy food. I dont know why people always try to test how spicy I can take things... I try to warn them... it becomes almost like a competition. they never win.

...the easy banter between males and females who kinda like each other but would never admit it for whatever reason but there's always that chemistry when they interact. tres interesante.

...surprises and thought out gifts. Id cherish a home made card over a store bought one anyday but if it is store bought make sure the words ring true.

when it rains. I imagine Im in Nigeria and there's no light but all the windows are open and I can sit there by the open windows and read a book

...Ben and Jerry's Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. very yummy!

...the color of my nails... no french tip necessary... if only I could keep them long

...gingerale, bitterlemon and tonic water... ever since I was a kid. Sometimes when I make punch I put tonic water in it... people dont like that so much

...how creative I am... seemingly without trying... it's got to be a gift from God


...calla lillies... there's just something about their elegance.. the way it's shaped... the way it curves... very sensual.... serene... it inspires romance i think... beautiful!

...where I am... because I know this is good but there are greater things in store and Im excited about it